Read anywhere with Kindle AppsThere is no greater source of stress for most teens than heading back to school. This anxiety affects kids of all types – from slackers to perfectionists, jocks to prom queens. It is true for kids who struggle at school, get poor grades and have few friends. But it’s also true for academically and socially high-functioning kids. September is a major transition for everyone (parents included). Every teen feels their problem is unique, that no one has ever felt quite like they do. But, I’ve found that their worries generally fall into three categories (and some teens may worry about all three.) Even for kids who have had a lot of contact with friends over the summer, particularly over social media, physically returning to school is still a difficult adjustment. “I am there in person. Walking down the hall. People looking at me. Me looking at them. And I feel they’re judging me. I am way more exposed. All the drama that goes on, it goes up a notch.”

The bottom line: Being back at school is a very big deal. It brings back all of the extreme self-consciousness that is such a large part of the school experience for teens. “Now I’m officially one more year closer to being out of school, when I have to go out in the world and somehow support myself. How am I ever going to do that? Can’t I just live in my parents’ basement, forever?” As little kids, the future is far enough away that they feel insulated from it. But with each new school year, that day of reckoning looms closer and closer. Each new school year ratchets up that lurking terror. Just thinking about their future overwhelms them with anxiety. For some teens, one of the appealing things about marijuana is that it can effectively remove that worry and keep their focus in the here and now. There’s no way around it: School requires you to work. Whether it’s a teen struggling to pass, or one who struggles to get all A’s, the stress is there. They worry they won’t be able to stay on top of it.

They worry there’ll be too much homework, and that the demands will take over their lives. Some worry that they will give up or not work as much they need to. “Yes, high school would actually be excellent if they didn’t make you work. That’s what ruins it.” How can a parent help them cope? Get them to school. Some teens, for precisely all of the reasons above, don’t want to go that first day. They complain of being sick. You want to be very careful how you deal with this. Make sure they truly are sick, because once they start missing school, the difficulties mount. Let them know that you understand that the beginning of school can be stressful. It can seem a little strange, even overwhelming, getting back into a routine, but all kids feel this way. Reassure them that if they do feel apprehensive about it, they are not alone. And questions like, “Are you sure you have everything you’re going to need? Everything in your backpack?” They feel this kind of parental fussing is a bit demeaning, but at the same time reassuring.

It is not all on their shoulders.wvu backpack cooler And talk to them about their future. costco backpack swiss armyTalk about the possibilities of what they might do once high school is over. goplug backpackTalk about more than one option. backpack slotted decoy bagThey may want to fend off planning for the future, but burying it only makes the fears grow worse – and harder to face. Set a work schedule. They can be infinitely optimistic about how they really are going to get their act together. “Yes, I don’t want my parents to make a work schedule for me. I want the freedom to be in charge of it.” Most teens don’t want their parents to get involved in scheduling their life.

They do all they can to resist it. “The more my parents try to get me to do my schoolwork, the more I don’t do it.” That’s actually not true. They may hate it. But your involvement does make a difference – if only to say that there are certain times when they are not allowed to do anything other than schoolwork. Some kids are good workers and genuinely do not need the guidance. You will know whether you have such a kid. But most do need it. The start of the school year is stressful for all teens. Be aware of it. Be as compassionate as you can. It is an important time for you to be involved. Even just being a cheerleader can help them get back in the swing of things. Clinical psychologist Anthony E. Wolf is the author of six parenting books and runsA photo posted by Waylon Lewis & Friends (@walkthetalkshow) on Jun 26, 2016 at 3:47pm PDT What this means is that we’ve reached a pivotal period in life, where all that we’ve known, no longer serves our growth of sound mind, body and spirit.

For myself, this time of life has strongly beckoned me just this year, although I’ve recognized this looming feeling lingering deep within for quite some time now. Where I was before has clearly served its purpose, and despite working hard to remain in place—within the beloved mountains I’ve called home for so long—it’s become clear finally, in my mind, that my purpose there has been served. We learn to trust this intuitive nature over time, as evidenced in how our lives are being guided and directed. When we feel lost, we begin to derail, and life gradually descends into a downward spiral that can become quite devastating and difficult to rise up from—unless we realize this soon enough. Beyond that, we must simply be willing to act in accordance with what the universe is ushering us toward. Earlier in the year, I began to envision my life elsewhere. Some new place in time, where I might invent a new lifestyle, forged around the person I’ve become, with the acknowledgement of what I’d be leaving behind.

It struck me finally, that Colorado might be that next place where I could reside. Without any certainty or assurance that this was the right move for me, I continued to trust in what the Divine was indicating to me. Much time was spent outdoors, in nature, more so than I’ve probably ever spent before this year. There was no reasoning or logic to support such a decision, other than my own reckoning that what was, no longer appeals to the life I wish to be leading now, as an independent facet of creation—awakening dreams, to meet their reality, through potential. Much confusion, heartache and pain ensued, along with newfound realizations and revelations each new week that passed, while the overshadowing intensity of this move transpiring closed in. My comfort zones were clung to, with less and less ferocity as I gradually let slip my grasp of all those who’ve occupied space in my life for so long—people, places and things; memories of what was. Following through with moving forward into a mysterious horizon, I found myself suddenly it seems, at a whim, in an entirely new place, which only a short time before was nothing but a vivid representation of what Spirit was calling upon me to oblige.

I found myself alone—in an alien frontier, in the shadow of darkness with nothing more than a backpack, hopes and newly transpiring dreams of what would become in each new waking moment. One day, while walking about this newfound place in time, it occurred to me, the naivety of it all—my choices to go where I’d never been before. To leap with an ounce of courage, to shed the immense fear and attachment to nearly eight years of my past life, no longer feeding the likeness of my soul. Oddly enough, parts of this story of which no new chapter had been written before now, began to write themselves. Finding new meaning in every new situation and acknowledging all of these new strangers, soul mates who I’ve surely met before, but am only greeting now, for the first time in this waking life, began to emerge. Immense gratitude began to infiltrate the space I so dearly occupy each day, and blessings seemed to be answered as I embraced that all of my needs, as basic as most are, are met with perfect timing.

Obstacles were faced with wonder, rather than defeat, and what used to be fearful to my nature instead manifest as opportunities to meet these new challenges with a new sense of faith and compassion—foresight. Healing began in many avenues of my life, both mentally and spiritually, while I noticed a physical shift in my body too. My perspective of what life was and how I view it today is slowly birthing its new reality. That wonder and naivety that children innately possess is finding a place within me once again, as I look around and simply appreciate life and its glory—to be here and now, alive and full of spirit. Tears have been shed, while grace has been given to what’s haunted me for so long up until now. Forgiveness has found itself in the space of mind and heart. I’m able to look upon others in a new light and also see myself differently now in many ways, too. More love, overall, exists within and throughout, and I only wish to continue radiating the same from here, forward.